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Russell Brand Rocks the Social Criticism

Can I be this guy when I grow up?

In a week when one deranged narcissist opened fire on his classmates in Washington State and another opened fire on police officers in Sacramento, the news is dominated by Renee Zellweger’s eyelids.

I know. It sounds implausible. But you know I’m not lying. Unless you’ve been under your bed all week. And if you have been, who would blame you?

But seriously.There’s still war. There are refugees fleeing for their lives. Ice caps are melting. Animals are going extinct. Humans are starving. But Americans can’t quit talking about whether an actress had plastic surgery. I mean, imagine! Plastic surgery! In Hollywood! Minds blown.

Enter Russell Brand. Let him have the final word. Please. Let it be the final word. As in last. Please.


Getting Real on Gun Violence

Thanks for the beautiful distraction, Ebola. It’s another chance for Americans to perfect their well-worn duck-and-cover freak-out over exotic threats. The current American boogeyman has killed less than a handful of Americans. A doctor riding a subway days before he develops a fever is the most hated man on US soil: the mega-celebrity of creepy people-murdering germs. While safety-obsessed Americans sit transfixed to their TV screens, imagining what invisible snot-borne pathogens are lurking on subway seats, yet another real-life killer walked right into a school and fired bullets into the bodies of American children. Right in the open. Bullets. Guns. The things that kill 30,000 Americans a year. Year after year.

Americans demand that their government DO SOMETHING to stop Ebola. Now. Or heads will roll. Careers will end. Careers already have ended.

Yet Republicans are blocking President Obama’s Surgeon General nominee, leaving the country’s top doctor position unfilled. Why? Because he’s vowed to tackle the thing that actually kills Americans. The thing that kills more kids than cancer, causes more deaths than car accidents. He can’t take that on. If he does, heads will roll. Careers will end.

It’s time to get real.